5 years later…

It’s still hard to believe 5 years have gone by since you were born into heaven. How can it be that your big sister, Tamara is already 7. So many days, minutes, and memories have happened without you here on earth. 

As I lay in bed and just remember the 9 months we had with you in my belly, I remember that you were so very loved. We all wanted so badly to play with you, hold you, and smell your fresh baby smell. Our hopes and dreams for you have been forever changed. Your death has changed me. Your life has given me purpose. I try every day to be the best Mommy to your big sister. I know you’re watching over me – you’re my guardian angel – and for that I am forever grateful. 

In all the chaos on the day you were born, I’ll forever remember one thing. You looked perfect. Hailey, your ten fingers and ten toes and perfect body was swaddled ever so beautifully by the nurse in a pink and white blanket. I held your body that was sleeping so peacefully in the arms of Jesus. You were just too precious for Earth. 

Hailey – You are truly the daughter of the King. Shine bright baby girl, especially today on what would have been your 5th birthday. Mommy loves you. 

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